


Fusing the Broken Pieces of Me and You (and You)

by Gir_Hugs



Category: The Martian (2015), The Martian - Andy Wier
Genre: Alternate Universe - Sentinels and Guides Are Known, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, M/M, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-03
Updated: 2015-11-03
Packaged: 2018-04-29 18:55:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5138858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gir_Hugs/pseuds/Gir_Hugs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He survived Mars, but the journey back home isn't going to be a walk in the park.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fusing the Broken Pieces of Me and You (and You)

LOG ENTRY: SOL 45

Okay, so here’s the thing. Now that I’ve taken care of the most vital objectives to ensure my continued survival and my little potato spawns are sprouting quite nicely (suck it, Mars) I’ve had some downtime to _really_ think about the crew. Now I’m not saying this to toot my own horn or anything, even though there really should be an entire marching band parading around behind me at all times, announcing my awesomeness to the universe at large because hey, I am doing the impossible by growing plants on Mars…okay, I am so totally tooting my own horn because I have most definitely earned that right, but getting back on track, I’m not so sure how the crew is going to manage without me.

Like, they’ll survive, of that I have no doubt, but what kind of condition, mentally and emotionally, are they going to be in upon return? Cause let’s face it, they need me, probably now more than ever. They think the great Mark Watney is dead and that is going to majorly fuck with their emotions. And who in the crew is in charge of the crew’s emotional well-being? Yeah, that would be me, the great Mark Watney.

Including a Guide on flight crews has always been part of NASA’s “Prepare for the Absolute Shittiest Scenarios Possible” mentality (though, I’m sure even the most pessimistic, doom and gloom, NASA crisis-planners never imagined my scenario, but hey, I like to go above and beyond). And why does NASA feel it necessary to include a Guide on the crew? Well, that would be because space travel is _stressful_. Like, Super Stressful. And what usually provokes a Sentinel into coming on-line? Yup, you guessed it, super fucking stressful situations!

Why do you think a metric shit ton of Sentinels are part of the military? It’s because military training and combat situations are…say it with me, STRESSFUL.

So, yeah, NASA makes sure to always have a Guide on the crew, because on the off chance that the training program isn’t stressful enough to make any latent Sentinel’s come into their own, and a Sentinel somehow comes on-line _during_ the mission…well, better have a Guide there to handle the baby-Sentinel.

NASA did not just pick me for my botany skills, awesome though they are, and my devilishly handsome looks, which only lose to the handsomeness of Dr. Bossy-Beck; NASA also picked me, over all the other qualified specialists, because I am a Level 2 Guide. Now, that in and of itself does not make me a special little snowflake. I mean, I’m the most powerful Guide to ever be part of a flight crew, sure, but most of my Guide-specialness is because of who is on the crew with me. And by that, I mean Commander Lewis.

See, Commander Lewis is a fucking badass. She is not only the first female commanding officer to ever lead a mission, she is also the first ever Sentinel to be included on a NASA flight crew. Now, NASA doesn’t _technically_ have any regulations explicitly forbidding the inclusion of a Sentinel on a flight crew, but no Sentinel had ever made it through NASA’s ridiculously hard, Sentinel-specific training program, until Commander Lewis. Like I said. Bad. Ass.

None of the rest of the Ares 3 crew had come on-line during the _Hermes_ trip from Earth to Mars and if there had been any latent Sentinels among the crew, that definitely would have been the time for them to come on-line…so there’s that, I guess. No baby-Sentinels trying to deal with their newly acquired super senses without Guide Extraordinaire Mark Watney to hold their hand. But, there’s still the problem of Commander Lewis not having me there for her.

Don’t get me wrong, Commander Lewis has her three heightened senses on lock down. She hasn’t zoned out since she was fourteen years old and only a year into her Sentinel training. The military always has Guides available to help enlisted Sentinels, and I know Lewis has interacted with Guides before me, but she never actually _needed_ one. Heck, she didn’t even need me during the entirety of the Earth to Mars transit, because, again, Badass.

But with the circumstances of the return trip - early evac, losing a crew member, losing the Guide crew member, making the call to leave behind said Guide crew member - let’s just say I wouldn’t be surprised if she does zone out at some point on the way back to Earth. And no one would blame her for it, or even be surprised, because seriously, so much stress, but being zoned out without a Guide around to help…well, it can be dangerous.

And while Johanssen (who scores high on empathy scales, but is not actually a Guide) knows a few breathing exercises and calming techniques that might help, if Lewis falls too deeply during a zone out then…well, Johanssen might not be enough to bring her out of it. So yeah, I worry.

Not just about Commander Lewis either. I worry about the whole crew. Space missions are highly volatile situations and while NASA runs extensive tests to make sure the crew’s inherent personality dynamics are non-explosive, having a Guide around to temper the more intense emotional fluxes helps. Like, a lot.

So now, the Ares 3 crew is on their way home after having lost a member of their crew - or so they think, but I’m too tough to kill, I’m like a space cockroach - and since said member also happens to be the Guide, they now have to suffer through the five stages of grief without any emotional Vicodin to alleviate the shitstorm of _feelings_ they are bound to be experiencing. And oh yeah, they also have to fly a fucking spaceship home while doing so.

Damn…I really wish I was with them.


End file.
